If you’re a fan of Scorsese movies, The Sopranos or being Italian, you’re in luck: For some reason, the mob wife aesthetic is taking off on TikTok. I haven’t been able to pinpoint the source of this trend beyond a number of TikTok videos of women wearing chunky jewelry and fur coats, but even that has been enough to upset some gatekeepers who would kindly request that you don’t appropriate the mob wife aesthetic, thank you very much.

@consciouscalofficial Real Talk. Fugggetaboutit #mobwives #mobwife #fyp #funny ♬ original sound - Conscious Cal Official

A TikToker who goes by Conscious Cal and does indeed look like a mob wife posted a video, taken in the snow, arguing that “if you’ve never been woken up for school by the motherfuckin’ feds lookin’ for your dad, you don’t deserve to wear this coat and you don’t deserve to talk about mob wife aesthetic.” She continues, “Oh, the feds never looked for your pops? If one of your cousins has never been to jail, if you don’t know a guy named Tony who knows a guy, if you don’t have an outstanding table at your favorite restaurant, you don’t deserve to wear this coat, you don’t deserve to claim mob wives.”

@anonymousally198 Replying to @Rachel you’re SPOT ON RACHEL!! ❤️ Mob wife makeup vs clean girl makeup. Mob wife makeup is not makeup, its a lifestyle and if you're not ITALIAN, you just look silly. Mob wife aesthetic is just a costume of decades of womens pain. #mobwifeaesthetic #mobwife #cleangirlaesthetic #makeuplooktrends #mobwifemakeup ♬ original sound - AnonymousAlly198

Another TikToker, Anonymous Ally, took a slightly different approach, arguing that the mob wife aesthetic isn’t just about makeup, it’s a lifestyle and turning it into an aesthetic is making a “costume of decades of women’s pain,” pain caused by years of having to avoid the authorities and support their husbands in prison.

Others have pointed out that the “mob wife aesthetic” is actually a fairly standard aesthetic across Southern Europe that women brought over to the U.S. when their families migrated; mobs and their families being an incredibly popular subject in pop culture, the aesthetic soon became linked to them, but it doesn’t necessarily mean they can claim exclusive ownership over fur coats and gold jewelry.

To me, the rising popularity of the mob wife aesthetic feels like a response to years of looks that emphasize “stealth wealth” or “clean girl” aesthetics. People are tired of being lowkey and are looking to embrace a bolder, brassier look. Plus, it’s cold out, and vintage fur is a great way to stay warm.

Whatever the inspiration, “mob wife aesthetic appropriation” isn’t a legitimate problem — people wearing fur coats and big hoops aren’t going to negatively impact actual mob wives in any way. And as Anonymous Ally inadvertently points out, don’t real mob wives have more pressing concerns to be focused on, like having husbands who are literally in the mob?